


Santa Fe

by orphan_account



Category: Newsies (1992), Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: 92sies, Anxiety, Other, Panic Attack, Reader Insert, do i care, livesies, no, this is the most cliche thing ever, we love that, x Reader, yay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:07:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27120878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Jack helps the reader out of a panic attack
Relationships: Jack Kelly & Reader, Jack Kelly x reader, Jack Kelly/Reader, Jack Kelly/You, Jack Kelly/y/n
Kudos: 25





	Santa Fe

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry this is so cliche I hate it too  
> There is a bit of blood and a panic attack is the main focus of this, so please don't read it if that triggers you. There's also like one swear word I think

Your breathing sped up, and you tried to hide it as you hurried back to Jack's "penthouse in the sky". 

You had sold all your papers already. You only bought fifty, and you had a talent for making people feel bad for you. 

Your legs started shaking uncontrollably as you climbed up the ladder, making it take twice as long as it should've.

You hauled yourself over the last rung of the ladder, arms starting to shake too. You tried to stand up, but your legs shook too much, and you collapsed back onto the metal floor.

Everything seemed to be moving too fast, and you were moving in slow motion. Sour, depressing, insecure thoughts invaded your head, and you started rocking back and forth in a ball, tears creating rivers down your cheeks. 

You kept thinking the panic attack couldn't get worse, but it did. It just kept getting faster and there were too many thoughts and it was too quiet and it was loud and is that footsteps oh no no no no no no no-

"Y/N?"

"Hey, Les," you said, trying to mask the panic from your voice. 

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Y-yeah, I'm fine." You angled yourself away so he couldn't see your tear stained face.

"Are you sure? Do you need anything?"

I gulped. "Um, can you get Jack?" You were amazed that your voice sounded relatively normal.

"He's at the Refuge, giving the kids some food and a bit of company." 

Your heart sunk and your breath quickened. "Oh. Okay, thanks Les."

"Okay."

His footsteps receded, and you let the panic take over again. 

_Jack doesn't care about you._

_You're ugly. Worthless._

_Why would he care about you?_

_You're just another annoying person for him to flirt with._

_He wouldn't even notice if you just disappeared tomorrow._

_Would anyone?_

_They probably all hate you. They would be glad if you were gone._

_They just pretend to like yo_ u.

_No, they don't even care enough about you to hate you._

_You're disgusting_.

You sobbed quietly, having mastered the art of that a long time ago. 

Pushing yourself across the ground with your feet, you pressed your back into a corner and just sobbed some more.

Your nails dug into your calves, hard. They left ten bloody crescents, and you did it again, and again, and again, till there were dozens of little c-shaped marks all over your legs. 

You screamed internally and dragged your nails over your face, leaving light scratch marks down your forehead and cheeks. 

A couple tears dripped off your chin and onto your leg, the salty water stinging the cuts. 

You heard voices below you, but your head was going too fast to pay attention. 

Oh no.

Footsteps.

Coming.

You felt another stab of panic and curled even further into a ball--if that was even possible. 

The footsteps reached the top of the ladder and stopped. 

"Oh no," you heard the person mumble. They grew closer, and your sobbing grew more frantic. 

You felt a warm presence at your right, and suddenly, there was an arm around your back, and another on your left shoulder, drawing you into their chest. 

You opened your blurry eyes and looked up to see Jack.

He looked saddened at your miserable state and wrapped his arms around you tightly.

"Shh. You're gonna be okay. Shh." He started singing in a soft voice.

" _Close your eyes, come with me, where it's clean and green and pretty, and they went and made a city outta clay_."

You relaxed slightly and closed your eyes as he laughed and continued singing.

" _Why, the minute that ya get there, folks'll walk right up and say, 'Welcome home, son, welcome home to Santa Fe_!'"

He ran his fingers gently through your hair, getting the tangles out, and you released a shuddering breath.

" _Plantin' crops, splittin' rails, swappin' tales around the fire, 'cept for Sunday when you lie around all day. Soon your friends are more like family, and they's beggin' you to stay! Ain't that neat? Livin' sweet in Santa Fe_."

After some hesitation, you snuggled into him more, practically melting into his chest.

" _Santa Fe, you can bet. We won't let them bastards beat us. We won't beg no one to treat us fair and square. There's a life that's worth the livin', and I'm gonna do my share. Work the land. Chase the sun. Swim the whole Rio Grande just for fun_!”

 _He's just pretending to like you_ , the voice in your head started whispering again. _All he wants is for you to calm down, so you'll go away._

This just caused you to panic again. You were practically hyperventilating by now.

Jack pulled away slightly, and a pang of fear hit you, afraid he was going to leave you.

Instead, he cupped your face and brushed some of your tears away with his thumbs. "Hey, hey… Don't you know that we's a family? Would I let you down? No way." He kissed your forehead gently.

He said the last line with such conviction that you couldn't help but smile a bit. And… maybe you also smiled because of the kiss. Just thinking about it again made your heart flutter.

He saw your lips curl into a smile, and grinned, bringing you back into his arms and leaning his cheek against the top of your head.

" _Just hold on, kid, till that train makes Santa Fe_."


End file.
